Why Your Goals Don’t Matter


….as much as what you do while trying to achieve your goals.

We set all different kinds of goals in life, financial goals, health goals and spiritual goals. These goals serve as marker for what we want to achieve, they suggest that wherever we are in our life now, there is room to grow.

Goals are not bad, in fact it is healthy and biblical to pursue vision and purpose.

Proverbs 29:18 Where there is no vision, the people perish: but he that keepeth the law, happy is he.

They matter to set in motion what we aspire to do, but what matters more are the changes that happen within us as a result of striving to achieve the goals.

For example, after recently losing 10 pounds (and maybe gaining back half of that this weekend), my current goal is 10 more. Setting goals requires us to do two things:

  1. take inventory of where we are currently in that area of our life
  2. change our behavior to reach our goal

For a weight loss goal, I might decide in order to achieve my goal I will eat a healthier diet and workout more. (We can have a goal, but we must change our behaviors in order to reach our goal) This means that I have to decide what it means to “eat a healthier diet” and “work out” more.

Some of you may be familiar with SMART goals, and while I use them myself and with my clients, setting goals and sub goals are just one piece of the puzzle, the other piece comes from the daily changes we make in order to reach our goals.

Life is not about the destination, it is about the journey. Not getting there, but what you do to get there.

Saying no when you want to say yes. Saying yes when you want to say no.

Changing our behavior to achieve our goals. The little daily changes that allow us to do what it takes to reach our goals.

like cutting out sweet treats and making sure I move my body for 30 minutes, even if it’s just walking my dogs.

The little decisions we make make a difference. Discipline is not something that we can achieve ourselves (sure we can try, but in our own strength it will never be enough)

We like to measure whether we are achieving our goals by looking at something observable (numbers on a scale, measurements) but what really matters are the changes that take place in our heart.

But the LORD said to Samuel, “Do not look at his appearance or at the height of his stature,because I have rejected him; for God sees not as man sees, for man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7.

Lasting change starts with heart change. It’s those heart changes that take place that motivate us to take action to change our behavior. Making small daily steps to take us closer to the goal, but really the goal doesn’t matter as much as the steps we take to get there.

Take the ultimate example of what it means to be a Christ follower depicted by the following verses.

  • He must become greater; I must become less. John 3:30
  • I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20

We aspire to become more Christ like and as a result of this goal, we make decisions (as best as we can) to reflect this goal. OR, we change our behaviors to reflect more of what we should be doing and the act of doing these actions start to slowly change our heart.

I have a really hard time losing weight, even with recently losing a little from doing the Daniel fast in January, I can’t let the goal become my only focus. If I focus too much on the end result and it doesn’t happen, I will be disappointed.

Expectations can be the root of discontentment. I’ve decided that even if those little daily choices I do differently don’t yield the result I have in mind, I will still be satisfied. I’ll be satisfied because they illustrate daily choices I make to be healthy, to take care of myself and to treat my body well, to feed it and nurture it as God intends. I honor God with my body and this is reflected in the choices I make. (At least this is what I try to do, it doesn’t happen this way all of the time, but thankfully God’s grace covers my sin when I chose my will over God’s will)

Will you be satisfied if the daily choices you are making to achieve your goal don’t result in how you hope for or imagine?

Blessings sweet friends!






6 thoughts on “Why Your Goals Don’t Matter”

  1. Hi Stephanie – I watched your Video info last night and it was quite good! I’m not sure if this is the way to contact you – I couldn’t find a contact form – so hope this works.

    I was wondering if I might take you upon your pro bono coaching offer? Or if you would like to exchange peer coaching sessions between the two of us? I am definitely in a hard place of transition/ transformation and I am finding it quiet difficult and lonely.

    I don’t want to put you on the spot as you may not have intended this as an offer to fellow coaches and/or you might want to have a chat first to see if we are a good fit.

    Because of our present circumstances, I am unable to provide momentary gain for you but could provide peer coaching in exchange if you’d like.

    However, please free free to say yes, no or renegotiate (as my mentor coach once wisely told me. 🙂

    Look forward to hearing from you.

    Thank you and God Bless,

    Terry Gassett, CPLC; Life Design Coach Here to There Life Coaching http://www.heretotherelifecoaching@gmail.com http://www.heretotherelifecoaching.blogspot.com

    Sent from my iPhone



  2. This is great! I love it. I am a firm believer of setting outlandish goals, and enjoying every step along the way. Sometimes, with God’s guidance, we smash the goals. Other times, He uses the journey to teach us a completely different lesson. Great piece!


  3. Love this, Stephanie! I love that the change starts on the inside, because that means it isn’t something we can achieve alone, as you said. God is in the business of helping us – doesn’t leave us alone to get there! You have been on my mind and I have been praying you would forgive me for last year (haha sounds weird to say) and my lack of discipline. It got crazy and I became one emotional mama! I am learning to let others in when life doesn’t look as pretty. I love you though and was so excited to see your post!



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