When the answer isn’t so obvious- Getting at the Heart

Tuesday’s class was all about exploring internal issues using a new paradigm. The tools we learned today are beneficial when dealing with highly emotional situations and highly emotional people. Prior to class we had to listen to an audio, “Heart of a Coach” which essentially talked about how during the coach training we will transform ourselves to love unconditionally just as Jesus loves us.

Such a simple concept, to say, but a much harder concept to put into practice. The idea of being there for the client and showing grace and love allows us to relieve the pressure of being the one that has all the answers. Instead, the client will initiate the change as we walk alongside them. Coaches foster authenticity and transparency by being authentic and transparent themselves. Over time, the idea is that these are no longer skills that we must put forth effort to practice, but instead through mindful awareness and the heart of Jesus becomes our nature.

In order to be completely transformed you must be willing to attack your demons. We must be able to go deep within ourselves and pull out the darkest part and bring it to light, and with the help of a coach acting as the vehicle of God, this is possible.

Our class was asked to share our goals aloud, as people shared it was interesting to see what they chose as their goal. With my goal to lose 5 pounds, I admit it is such a shallow goal, and in fact with my peer coach I explored the issue further (that will discussed in the next post).

Not every goal is shallow, in fact there are often emotionally charged and littered with several obstacles that are preventing the person from achieving their overall goal. This is when we use O.P.S. to observe, probe and sift further by asking open-ended questions, revealing and ownership questions. This is where you pack a punch not only with succinct words, but with gut-level questions.

Practicing this allows us to dig and ask the tough questions. I was on the other side of this during my peer meeting, where the question is so poignant that it leaves you stunned.

Overall this class is going way too fast. We are to be looking for people that we can coach as part of our internship for 6 weeks. I have some ideas in mind of who I think this should be, but ultimately it is up to them. I’ve met some great, inspiring people from class, and even from my Tuesday morning bible study.

One particular lady reached out to me and we met for lunch on Wednesday. It was a great conversation, she said she was interested in christian coaching for her daughter, so I told her about it and told her that the best way to determine if becoming a christian coach is for you is to be coached first. I gave her my contact information to pass along and I hope that I will hear from her. All I can do is pray about her to have guidance and insight to see her clear direction. After our meeting, she sent me words of encouragement that really spoke to me.

You and I have been given gifts to help others see theirs. We are partners with God to bring the good news of salvation, healing and deliverance to the lost and broken so that others can achieve the goals and the destiny that God has planned for them before they were born. (Jeremiah 29:11)

We are in fact, helpers and both serve by listening and trying to understand, direct and guide people experiencing problems or pain. In the midst of one conversation she told me something in confidence and said, “I haven’t told anyone else that, but I felt like you would understand.” I felt very honored when I heard that, as I was listening and engaged in her story, practicing my coaching skills without really giving it a second thought.

The idea of these principles becoming effortless and automatic as we develop the true heart of a coach, expressing unconditional regard to to others is a true measure of the abundance of Christ that lives within us.

And we, who are with unveiled faces all reflect the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his likeness with ever- increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Cor 3:18

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